Just what everyone is talking about
Has anyone been following the Terry Schiavo case?
I hadn't been at all and then a blog I enjoy got into it. The post and the comments here: http://www.scalzi.com/whatever/003473.html#comments
I point it out because when I first heard about it I had some pleasantly strong opinions based on my sketchy information. Then I read this comment thread and there are so many interesting and complex and important issues; living wills, the rights of the disabled, legislation of personal issues to name but a few.
Though I'd love to have more discussion on any of those topics that's not why I'm posting about this here. I first got my ears perked up to Ms. Schiavo's case by this post: http://katieallisongranju.blogspot.com/2005/03/terri-schiavo.html in which Ms. Granju (recently fairly bitterly divorced) is vehement that, despite her previous strong feelings on the bonds of a nuclear family, a husband shouldn't have the right to make the decision that Mr. Schiavo is making. So, what I'm putting out to the GFverse is a question about that.
Here's an overview of what's been swimming in my head about it. I love my parents and I like them (I know this isn't strictly true of all our members) but I still would expect that, if I were to become domestically unionized my partner would be the person I'd choose to make life, death and gray area in between decisions. I suppose I do trust my parents to make this sort of decision for me. Since my parents are getting on and my most recent date was a bust I tried to run through my friends and see who I might designate to make such a decision. Man, it's weird to think of anyone making this sort of decision for me. But I feel as though I'd be able to make the decision for someone else, if I had to. My mom has eye signals set up for me so I'll know what to do for her. Yet, it's not as easy as saying that Ms. Schiavo should be taken off a ventilator and will die shortly (if any such decision can be called easy) it's a matter of her body starving to death. Someone in one of these comment threads says that the legal participants aren't thinking of Terry, only of themselves - her parents are quoted as saying, "She is my life."
Sigh. I find it fascinating. Not in an ogling the people going through this horror kind of way. More in a we're likely all going to face this at some level how do we do it kind of way. And you guys are the go to people when I have these questions.
Total aside: If someone can teach me how to do the cooler thing where you link to something by programming a word that gets underlined and is the link (on my Mac, I can do it on PC) I'd be so grateful.
I hadn't been at all and then a blog I enjoy got into it. The post and the comments here: http://www.scalzi.com/whatever/003473.html#comments
I point it out because when I first heard about it I had some pleasantly strong opinions based on my sketchy information. Then I read this comment thread and there are so many interesting and complex and important issues; living wills, the rights of the disabled, legislation of personal issues to name but a few.
Though I'd love to have more discussion on any of those topics that's not why I'm posting about this here. I first got my ears perked up to Ms. Schiavo's case by this post: http://katieallisongranju.blogspot.com/2005/03/terri-schiavo.html in which Ms. Granju (recently fairly bitterly divorced) is vehement that, despite her previous strong feelings on the bonds of a nuclear family, a husband shouldn't have the right to make the decision that Mr. Schiavo is making. So, what I'm putting out to the GFverse is a question about that.
Here's an overview of what's been swimming in my head about it. I love my parents and I like them (I know this isn't strictly true of all our members) but I still would expect that, if I were to become domestically unionized my partner would be the person I'd choose to make life, death and gray area in between decisions. I suppose I do trust my parents to make this sort of decision for me. Since my parents are getting on and my most recent date was a bust I tried to run through my friends and see who I might designate to make such a decision. Man, it's weird to think of anyone making this sort of decision for me. But I feel as though I'd be able to make the decision for someone else, if I had to. My mom has eye signals set up for me so I'll know what to do for her. Yet, it's not as easy as saying that Ms. Schiavo should be taken off a ventilator and will die shortly (if any such decision can be called easy) it's a matter of her body starving to death. Someone in one of these comment threads says that the legal participants aren't thinking of Terry, only of themselves - her parents are quoted as saying, "She is my life."
Sigh. I find it fascinating. Not in an ogling the people going through this horror kind of way. More in a we're likely all going to face this at some level how do we do it kind of way. And you guys are the go to people when I have these questions.
Total aside: If someone can teach me how to do the cooler thing where you link to something by programming a word that gets underlined and is the link (on my Mac, I can do it on PC) I'd be so grateful.
posted by Kizz at 3/23/2005 09:10:00 PM
2 Comments:
There's no good answer here; someone in one of the postings that you sent us to calls it a "lose-lose" situation, and they've got it exactly right.
I think one of the main things that bothers me about this whole case is that it should never have gotten this far to begin with. It's been said that Terry made her wishes known before she had her heart attack 15 years ago and, had those wishes been respected, she would have died then and would not now be a household name.
I'm disgused by politicians using this horrible (and PRIVATE) situation to get themselves airtime. For all the republicans who go around touting states' rights and the sanctity of marriage, it is blatently hypocritical for them to be interfering in a place where both those tenets obviously apply. This is not an abortion issue, and the republicans should stop treating it as such.
Recognizing that I'm coming at this from a woefully under-informed place (I only hear what's being said on the news and NPR, and I've found myself growing increasingly distrustful of American media under this administration), I have to come down on the side of the husband (who, it's been determined by several courts, has come down on Terry's side - let's not forget that this is all about what Terry wanted). Of course, there are a lot of factors that play into my opinion, not the least of which is that I certainly wouldn't want MY parents making life-and-death decisions for me or anyone I love. Beyond that, whose quality of life are we talking about here, anyway? Her parents want to keep her alive, I've heard it said, because THEY want her in their lives. It seems cruel for me to say, especially given that I'm a parent myself, but it's wrong for them to be that selfish. She's not a pet, and it's not her purpose in life to be anything to anyone else. I've read that her brain isn't simply damaged - it's gone, having been replaced with spinal fluid. She has no hope of recovery, even partial or moderate recovery. None. She cannot fullfil any of her own purposes in life. For others to keep her here for their own pleasure is profane.
I'm pretty sure that it wouldn't hold up in court (and we have living wills anyway, but just so you know), but I'm saying it right here - I do not want to be kept alive by artificial means if it is determined by medical professionals that I have no hope of recovering from an injury or illness to such a state where I could have any kind of meaningful life. Colin knows that - and now you all know it, too. If, Heaven forbid, I should be put in such a position, I want you all to have Colin's back. No one should have to fight about something like this alone. No one should have to fight about something like this AT ALL, but, given what's happening right now, one can't be too secure in the knowledge that there's a support structure out there.
My uninformed, non-influential two cents.
It's my understanding that the husband is the only person who heard those wishes. And then I heard something about him being estranged. Anyone know more about that? Not knowing him at all I'm still coming down on his side because it does seem that he is trying to fulfill Terry's wishes, not his own. Although I'm sure plenty of people disagree with me on that one. The other thing that makes me trust him (again, if it's true) is that his spokesperson says that he's been staying by his wife's side since the feeding tube was removed. I think if there were ulterior motives he wouldn't be sitting with her as she goes. And he's been fighting this case for 11 years. If he was trying to get rid of her to make his own life easier couldn't he simply have left her in her parents' care?
I agree with the view that the gift we're all getting from this horror is an impulse to talk about it. It's odd that, since I'm the girl whose favorite conversational lull topic is how people want their wishes to be fulfilled after they die, that I haven't asked more people about their living will choices. In the past week that I've been listening to news on this case I've heard the hard answers from a few friends, and been asked to back up 2 spouses including Colin. I knew before that it was important to talk to your family about and to have written down but this is upping the ante. We need to tell as many people as possible what we want. Our families need to have support if it comes to this because technology is outstripping our ability as a society to handle these decisions.
On that topic no life support please. Yes, please listen to all the experts, please determine that hope is completely lost and I'm unable to make the decision for myself. Then let me go, please. Also, I'm sorry, and thank you - in case I'm not able to say so at the time.
Post a Comment
<< Home